Sunday, July 30, 2006

Daily Pain In A Different Light

Are you the parent of your pain?

It's a beautiful hot morning and I'm finishing my yoga breathing and stretching, to help me deal with physical pain.  I know there is a group of us who live with chronic, exhaustive pain daily, and we all have our rituals and habits we perform because of what is hurting us.  I want to address something about that.  Energy.

Everything, every situation, every sound or thought or act is composed of pure energy.  Our high school physics reminds us that energy cannot be destroyed, only changed.  When we exist in pain, we create a state of energy with particular qualities.  Do you ever notice when first meeting someone online who you cannot see, that they introduce themselves by listing their ailments?  It soothes the human need to be assured that those listening to us know our hurtful condition - I just did it at the start of this entry.  But soon a person can easily become what acts upon their bodies, they become their disability and that's sad, indeed.  I know pain is energy and I cannot destroy it, but there is something I can do. 

After many months of meditating on the Almighty Power that controls this Universe, I found that I could transform my energy of pain into the energy of nothingness, of non-pain.  Then I could throw it out.  Period.  The power of the mind over everything.  It doesn't mean I am out of pain.  It means I've taken steps to regain my power over it, of how I chose to live, which pain is trying to rob me of.  Again, it's all energy, which can be changed - I can change how I view and maintain this anguish thereby adjusting the fullness of my life and throwing out anything that bars my way to a happier, more giving existence.       

Unless I reshape what hurts me I cannot deal with it and will always be hurting, uncomfortable, unable to partake of life's bounty.  So I use the incredible energy of my chronic pain to motivate me into transforming it into something I don't need, I don't want, and I mentally toss it out.  What really happens, however, is that these thoughts, which are actions, become part of the complete Universe, each molecule being sent out into the cosmos still existing as energy but in a form that doesn't fall on me.  I do not own this pain, I am not it's parent. 

Many of us are forced to medicate ourselves daily.  We do this because we have to live, and in the most complete way we know.  Chemicals work, since we are mostly made of chemicals, and the ones we take for our ailments co-exist and act in accord with our natural endorphins, or morphine, which keeps us from feeling pain from even a slight breeze.  Humans are so vulnerable to their environs, but don't always think to change them.  They find it simpler to accept what is given them, to adapt to it as it is.  And who can blame them, it's extremely difficult to maintain a semblance of normalcy when your every nerve is screaming at you.      

Have you adapted to life as it is, or do you seek to change certain parts of it that stifle you?  It's so easy to medicate, relax and do only what is possible.  That's acceptance, good or bad it's acceptance of a condition which impacts the way we live.  Many of us work through our pain, we have jobs or children and other responsibilities.  Many cannot, they have _________(fill in disease).  See how it becomes who you are if you see it that way?  But whatever our condition, we have the power within us to change this energy, not adapt to it by accepting it.  We can adapt in other ways that are positive, that don't make the pain energy too strong.  Why do we bother to take our medicines if we have no care for a good life, to heal?  If you're doing things to help yourself then it means you want to change your situation.  So we already know we care for ourselves, we look to make a decent life a possibility, but we only go just so far.  When you fight against something it only exhausts you and expends wasted energy.  When you try to harmonize with something, it then adapts to you, not the other way round.  Why not transform unwanted states of energy into unbound molecules and send them out into the universe?  It's not easy, it's not hard.  It's just another way to live.  YOU MAY NOT BE ABLE TO RELIEVE YOUR PAIN, BUT YOU CAN RELIEVE YOUR SUFFERING.  I believe this.          

13 comments:

siennastarr said...

Very insightful entry, Luddie.  You are so smart!  I say that with the utmost respect.  

You certainly gave me food for thought.

Thank you!  :)

Jackie

barbpinion said...

A wonderful entry; great food for thought.
Bless you,
Barb- http://journals.aol.com/barbpinion/HEYLETSTALK

angelm0304 said...

I found this  entry very interesting.  I love your journal and will definitely be back again.  Thank you for visiting my journal recently.
Hugs,
Angel
 

artloner said...

Very interesting AND food for thought.  :)

lurkynat said...

great entry Cathy!
very thought provoking!
love,natalie

cyndygee said...

I have worked at being the parent of my PAIN . . .  chiropractors, physical therapists, deep breathing . . .     but my pain is a bit of a brat, I must say!  LOL!
It's great that we share what works . . .  I certainly don't want to be known as a "spineless creature"  . . .  he he.  Neuropathy was just THE BEGINNING of the symptoms of "MY BRAT" and (as the parent) I easily controlled it and kept working . ..  it's when you're in that big ocean of pain and the BREAKERS roll in that it's a bit more difficult to surf your way through them . . .   it's more difficult than just WILLING energy to go join other energy . . .  YOU must have reached a higher plain of understanding . . .  or you don't have back spasms that involve the BIG muscles in the back . ..   kinda hard to "deep breathe" your way through back spasms.  You can barely THINK during a major back spasm!  If you've overcome them, I'd like to hear the particulars!  


I refuse to BE my physical problems.  That's the reason I'm in THE HEALING GARDEN and write a positive E-mail FOR OTHERS IN PAIN six times per week.  But let me just say THIS . . .  I don't know the extent of YOUR pain.  It's impossible for me to know, but I offer THIS thought:  

If you haven't ever visited Paris, it would be difficult to give one directions around the city . . .   wouldn't it?  

I congratulate you on becoming the PARENT of YOUR pain!  That's simply WONDERFUL!
Cyndy

valphish said...

Hey Cathy =)  I now remember... I was supposed to read, I was supposed to read!  LOL  Hey honey!  I had to read this a couple times to get the gist.  So, being in pain myself for 40 years and severe pain for ten years 24/7, I can agree with some points here.  I DO agree with harmonizing with your pain and illnesses.  I try so hard not to define myself as my illnesses.  When someone is first diagnosed and awhile thereafter I think this is hard to do, though.  They are angry and they want to fight.  Don't you think so?  I do have to take medicine, though.  If I didn't I would be bedridden.  Period.  I harmonize with my pain by accepting it and breathing with it and meditating, stretching, praying, slowing down, and well I have other personal ways of doing this.  I think this takes many years of learning about your pain and accepting it.  Many never learn this and some never do for they are ANGRY about being sick or like being sick.  Now some people might get angry at that last sentence I wrote, too, don't you think?  Still, some are soooooo sick that NOTHING at all can take away their pain and life is hideous.  Anyway, interesting entry.  Hope you are still healing well!  I just read about your apartment building.  Seems like a lovely place to live =)!!  Love, Val xox
http://journals.aol.com/valphish/ThereisaSeason

luddie343 said...

Val dear - it's fascinating, I notice some took this one way, others another.  I agree with needing to befriend your pain if you're planning to live with it in any kind of harmony.  If you fight it, push again it, you get worse.  What you're doing for your condition I find intelligent and worthwhile, and it's an ongoing thing - you never really "finish" controlling it.  If meds help, one should take them.  There's only so much the mind can control.  Love you hun, Cathy    

cacklinrosie101 said...

Just had to find this since it seemd to cause a bit of a stir.  I think a lot of people read and comprehend things in totally different ways.  I can fully understand your point.  We don't have the power to change the pain; just not let it be the control.  Good entry.  HUGS  Chris

treesrgreen78 said...

Been away, started reading emails. Some no longer wanted a person in the Healing Garden.  I learned this was u, to say the least without reading this entry, I was astounded.  We may not always agree with entries, many can make different interpretations on what is said.  I doubt that u meant any disrespect to anyone. As for me, I am Trees, I say what I think and never intend to hurt anyone, although I am sure at times I do.  We have spoken many times. Also you introduced me to this wonderful land.  I have not had the opportunity to partake in the Healing Garden I have been on vacation.  While i dont necessarily agree with some treatments I certainly respect why some may choose one treatment over another and some have no choice but to take dreaded meds.
For me I take many pills, but only take pain meds when it gets beyond me, I refused narcotics and get nerve blocks, no they dont take away the pain but help to make it bearable.  I am told one day, will have to take the meds as yet my solace is my garden.  Yes indeed I have severe pain doing it  but the peace and serenity in that garden,now the healing garden in journal land will help me and others to endure our pain.  We must respect whetever choice one chooses to deal with their pain. I know in my heart you meant that you deal with your pain as you see fit. Did not really mean any disrespect to others.  I do art, I help others oners on here and work in my garden. It does not take the pain away, in fact it probably increases it. My spirit and soul heal doing these things. It helps the physical pain in its own way. God bless all in the healing garden. While we dont particularly like certain opinions, we can disagree, but to disallow someone in that garden, I dont agree with that.  The healing garden can heal your feelings too. God bless the healing garden & luddie while i dont understand all your comments I respect them.  

TreesRGreen78

merry1621 said...

I do the very best I  can to live with my pain.

I do not believe that what works so well for you is right for everyone.

If it works for you, great!  I am happy for you.


But for those of us who do rely on medications, it can make us feel bad.  I know that was not your intention. But I am not weak, my pain is NOT just in my head, it is in my back, my neck, and etc.

Because my pain cannnot be "thought away"  I guess I am not the parent of my pain. And right now I feel like I just flunked the test!  

I try to make those I touch feel better, not worse, and you made me feel worse.
I know you probably had no intentions of doing this, but that is how it made me feel.  I am just being honest.
Merry
merry1621@aol.com

luddie343 said...

Merry, this is Cathy - I can't believe I'm still trying to explain this.  I sent you emails in this attempt.  I'm sorry, but your pain IS in your brain, you only FEEL it in your back and neck.  That's just biology, our brain controls everything we feel.  And you didn't "flunk" anything, this was not a test - I can't fathom how you thought it was!  If you find you are NOT parenting your pain, then you DID understand my thoughts perfectly, I'm clearly saying it might be helpful NOT to "baby" or pamper it, living according to its dictates.   As for Rx, I'm saying take it if you have to (as I do) or don't. whatever works.  This entry was about ENERGY and how pain is just another FORM of energy, therefore we can make it into something else - at least try to.  It wasn't meant to hurt anyone and was very misunderstood.  Some have trouble even taking in a breath, so obviously not everyone will get anything from this.  And "thinking away pain"?  I've explained this entry many times, if anyone is still confused, my advice is just let it go.    

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