Friday, August 4, 2006

My Regrets

I've been told that my entry "Everyday Pain No More" upset a few people, though I've heard from but one.  Well, one person is enough - I've changed the title and ask that anyone who reads it please try to understand, I'm saying NOT to parent your pain, not to "baby" it or pamper it.  Do what you have to in order to live another day as completely as you can.  It seems the entry has been misunderstood.  I apologize to anyone in The Healing Garden who felt I was not being empathetic, that's not possible for me.  I only listed one of my disabilities because, as I said, the rest are negligible to me because I choose to see them that way.  Doesn't mean they aren't a pain, and a daily one.  But if this is a kind of ailment contest, boy am I in the wrong place!  My Journal should be private, then.  But I think people read that entry and simply didn't understand it, didn't think it was fair that someone could "think" away pain - I never said that.  Not the first time a person will be misunderstood, won't be the last.  I understand completely and still view those people, whoever they may be, as courageously trying to deal with unbearable pain.  But I regret anyone felt badly about my words, no one will always be agreed with.  YOU MAY NEVER BE FREE OF PAIN, BUT YOU CAN RELIEVE YOURSELF OF SUFFERING.  That's my belief.           


sugarsweet056 said...

I understood what you were saying!
Knowing you to be such a kind & considerate person, I know it hurt you that some one would misunderstand...please don't let it bother you. We all get misunderstood! I do A LOT!!!
As my Mama used to say, "Be like a duck, Sugar, let it run off your back." God rest her sweet soul!
Blessings dear,

princesssaurora said...

I understood what you meant...

I have a friend who has a quote 'I may be in pain, but that doesn't mean I have to BE one!'  as her email siggy.

It is so true.

be well,

ps... you can quote this to anyone you need to if you would like....

bobandkate said...

Cathy, don't worry about being misunderstood. Whatever we say or write, people will misunderstand something. Keep on keeping it real in your journal,

cacklinrosie101 said...

Don't let it get to you.  You were only offering something that works for you and not telling others how to live with pain.  Besides that, the mind is a very powerful thing.  Hang in there...HUGS  Chris

daddyleer said...

Hello! I hope you don’t mind a stranger dropping into this. I found your question “Are you the parent of your pain?” an intriguing entry.

hugsdoodlewacky said...

Hi there,I dont know you,but,I did read what was said and I understood it,and I dont understand alot of things in all deal with our own pain diffrently,I think.I am sorry this happend to you.God bless you.(((((((((((HUSTOYOU))))))))))

siennastarr said...

Don't you hate that you have to apologize for something that you wrote in YOUR journal!?  This is YOUR journal, and people are not always going to agree with everything you think or say.  It's the way of the world!  I've read things on peoples journals that I didn't agree with, but I generally don't make a comment.  But that doesn't mean that I am going to just stop reading them because, "OMG they said something I didn't completely agree with!"  I'm sorry... I just think it sucks that people have to apologize for expressing their feelings on THEIR OWN DAMN JOURNAL!"  I should talk though.. cause I've done it too.  Apologize that is..


lifes2odd said...

Maybe you could change your journal name to "DARE TO SPEAK" ;-)

herlippy1 said...


For myself, I've always felt that to be true as well.  My journals are not about "my pain", but rather information to inform and help others.

Professionally though I also understand, that we are also unique individuals.  Chronic pain has part physical, emotional, and psychological accepts.  At different times during our lives, and during aspects of an illness even that changes.  

For some, dealing and managing is easier then others, there is no magic formula good for all.  We each find what works for us, during that stage of our lives. Knowing full well, that come tomorrow, or next week, that may no longer work as well.  

This is why the Healing Garden can be such a good thing.  Passing along tips, information, and things to people new to a condition.  That's why I joined up.  I didn't see your original entry, but I'm not here to judge anyone's feelings, opinions, or writing styles.  We are all unique individuals, and I happen to like it that way...:)

Have a great weekend...!!!

nyuknyukpik2 said...

As someone who suffers from chronic pain--I understand where your original entry was coming from.
I also understand why people are offended by it.

I can see why people who suffer feel like their pain has been minimized--although I realize that was not your intention.

I can see why people do not want you in the healing garden--for they feel unsupported--once again--not your original intention.  

I can also respectfully disagree with you on this --yet still acknowledge how what you may do works with you.

My personal philosophy is quite different from yours--I believe that you need to embrace your pain and embrace your feelings in order for you to be a whole human being and in touch with your spirit and your soul.

onestrangecat said...

I admit I was confused some by your last entry.  But that is probably not how you wrote it but the brain fog I live in.  LOL
I am so sorry that so many misunderstood what you were trying to say.  Please try not to let it bother you. (I know that is hard)
Take care.  Keep up the postive thinking.


lurkynat said...

I love you Cathy!'Go forth and bring light"

queeniemart said...

Write for one else. If you offend or piss someone off and you didnt mean to, well it is then THEIR issue, not yours. This journal was created by you for a reason..dont lose sight of that reason.
Keep on writing!
hugs, lisa

memes121 said...

As head of the Healing Garden, I had to go with the majority. But most have had a change of heart. They are wonderful caring people and they meant nothing against you personally. Some nerves are raw and they took it the wrong way. I am sorry you were hurt. The majority has spoken and if you will forgive us, we would be honored to have you as a member. Please email me so that we can talk about this more in detail. Thank you. Tammy

herheadsnacloud said...

I think it is your journal and you should not have to apologize for anything....people do not have to agree with it or read it...It is YOURS! In this format words can be misconstrued easily.........Please stay who you are and do not worry about editing what you say....this is YOUR place and we are just visitors .....who do not have to visit if we do not like what you are saying. B. Lynne

merry1621 said...

I did not agree with this post. But I respect that you have a right for your point of view.  Just as I do for mine.  While we may be on different sides of the way we speak of this issue, we still both care about The Healing Garden.

treesrgreen78 said...

My dear friend, you need not apologize to anyone for your points of view, we all see and think differently.  I understood where you are coming from.  I know you well and well enough to know you would not minimize anyones pain as you suffer greatly yourself.  We who have chronic pain and other illnesses have a daily struggle with dealing with these, some choose med, some mediation some other modalities of dealing with it.  We all can choose as we see fit.  For me  I have pain from the top of my head to the tips of my toes  in my whole body and in my bowel and bladder  which is severe.  I choose to say I am going in my garden or i am painting, pain take a hike for a bit.  Of course the pain does not take a hike but my spirit and soul for the time i am doing things  put aside the pain and for me that is a healing thing.  No the pain does not go  but for a little while I have peace and tranquility with my loves that god has given me.  I completely understand where you are coming from.  For those that dont, I understand that as well.
We must feel free to express our views if we make a journal.  You my friend are a brilliant writer, have much insight and while many will differ in opinions, we can all respect each others view points.  God bless luddie continue your writing, you are remarkable.


angelrose2u said...

well honey I didnt read the healing garden . But I do know one thing you have a right to your own opinion and whatever works for you and helps you. Do it. I agree one may never be free of pain sometimes but you can releieve yourself of suffering. And talk to the the master physian, the healer of all :). I'll keep you in my prayers too

Ps thank you for visitning my journal so often and for your kind words


geminirising12 said...

It is not necessary for you to apologize to anyone -
How can you apologize for writing about what you really feel and believe??  
Your feelings are your own to share.  
All you can do is put them out there for us to read.

After reading this entry, it gave me another OPTION to deal with pain.
It was educational, as it told me God gave me the power to create miracles.  
My mind and my brain.  

What you write and share belongs to YOU.

What we choose to take away with us belongs to US!

God has given you a wonderful "gift" -your ability to write!
So you go girl! :)

As always, I look forward to your next entry.

Anonymous said...