Sunday, October 15, 2006

Pondering

There comes a time when a person just needs to PONDER, you know?  I was doing that today, and arrived at some redundancies, pedacilloes, assorted lunacies and just plain funnies.  Think about this:

                          How redundant are these:

Moisterizing mouth wash

Spray-on salad dressing

The to-be-built WALL around our southern borders (true!)

Infant-sized safety equipment (tiny helmets, knee pads, etc) think about what this mother is planning for her child!

A guy is robbing a store, puts a PLASTIC bag over his head, goes in and demands the dough.  TV news, can't beat it.

                               Something I actually heard:

"I knew it was dangerous before I tried it."

"There are no stupid questions, only stupid answers."  (I swear, this was an adult!) 

"Although the jockey fell off the horse, the judges have ruled that if it gets past the finish line, a rider-less horse still wins the race."

                               Biggest quote gaffe of all time

"One step for man, one giant leap for mankind."  Now, you'd THINK we'd get it right for the first MOON LANDING for petes sake but nooo, I think Mr. Armstrong was so nervous of little green men coming at him with ray guns he just forgot thatall important "a" in one step for a man...etc.  Redundant gaffe.

                    Actual Everyday Sayings I Got Mixed Up As a Kid

KILLER BE KILLED ("Kill or be killed")

STICKY END OF THE SHORTS (I couldn't find  "the short end of the stick" nor grasp why it would be bad luck - to me, REAL bad luck would be the reverse - having sticky ended shorts)

HEY, LET'S STALK ("Hey, Let's Talk")

MEN WALK PAST GIRLS MADE OF GLASS (ok laugh)

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Some ponderings are not funny at all, but think of the odds:  You have three young women all considered the ideal of beauty, they're big TV stars making a mint, everyone adores them.  Several years go by and all three, still beautiful, end up with cancer.  Yet - in reality, these are now the USUAL odds for women.  BTW, those women are the "smart" one, the "classic" beauty and the "dipsy" sexy blonde.  

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But for a lack of $2500. I was unable to pursue a little invention I thought up years ago, after seeing dark-skinned women in the summer who used talcum powder on their arms and neck area - it looked ridiculous and they felt that way.  My chemist would help to "invent" a talcum powder that disappears upon application.  It's a simple idea but I didn't have the entrance fee, only enough to patent it - along with the zillion other could-be-great ideas gathering dust. 

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Here's another one I thought would work:  No one likes wrinkles, although some will SAY they do "I earned those!" but they'd rub in that cream if they knew it worked, really worked.  So I thought, well, what's a wrinkle anyway, except a scar?  In a manner, on the face we create this scarring by facial exressions used more than others, combined with a dash of DNA.  Since there's already a facial cream on the market called "Megaderm" which softens the look and feel of a scar until it's barely noticeable, why wouldn't this work on a laugh line or two?  Think I'll try it when I get a wrinkle.  

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I was Iming with a friend about human dynamics when she suddenly asked, "So what's D and A anyway?"  We talk about other things now.