Friday, June 19, 2009

"Other Than That, Mrs. Lincoln...


....did you enjoy the play?"




I was thinking after reading your last post, (yes yours) the importance of pain in our lives. Sometimes it's all you nee
d.

How many of us go to amazing lengths to insure we never feel anything but what we choose? It reminds me of that kid with the iPod, he only has to hear what he wants, talk when he wants, listen or not listen, the universe can continue to expand and he only needs to care about his own little world. Is this okay?

It's not easy - after getting a d
ose of pain I look for it to get lost, fast. I reach for something, anything, even just a book. We don't like to feel uncomfortable. Some say we should never have to be. Now I imagine a machine-run world where our backsides are so wide from never having to do anything we turn into giant arses. Not an appealing vision.

This isn't a judgment call. I'm simply curious what you do to relieve pain. Any kind. Talk to me, Mrs. Lincoln......


22 comments:

Loving Annie said...

Cathy...
Very good post.

I used to bury myself in fiction books as one major way...

In addition, I used to be in total denial to block out the pain, and either obsess about the past or the future instead of facing the present.

I did not take repsonsibility for my actions, and blamed others without seeing my cooperation in what had not worked and how I'd had a part in it, even via unconscious repetitive habit patterns.

Now I think pain is a useful tool to tell me I am off course about something. I'm not seeing the lesson, or am pereciving something in an ineffective way.

Pain is a great way of letting me know if I am on the right track for what is good for my Soul or not.

The faster I face it head on and start asking the questions and seeing clearly about what drew me to the situation, action or person - the faster the pain heals and resolves/clears.

There are always layers of awareness and understanding.

So now I can see the play - as well as understand the rest of it :)

And you have to have a willignrss to keep learning. Always.

But sometimes I take a break from the work and have quite a bit of ice cream or fattening foods to numb me out !
And then go back to the work, because, ultimately, that is where the freedom lies that means I'll have LESS ongoing pain in my life by not getting in my own way anymore...

Cathy said...

Yikes Annie dear one, you have guts to be this honest. Kudos!

Big Mark 243 said...

Is there any better motivation than pain?

That is how I find relief ... I let it motivate me.

Both with the transition of loved ones, their memories live on as guides to finding my happiness. I gladly bear the wait of finding my happiness for them on this sphere, as they are no longer able to pursue theirs. I draw energy from that.

In sports, pain motivates in different ways. The pain of losing makes you want to suffer the pain of effort to become a winner. It always is a thing that can act as an catalyst for a person.

Even in the act of seeking relief, the positive effect is a result of effort. It isn't mere happenstance, and isn't there a physics equation about action ... cause and effect stuff ... opposite action to a reaction ..?

I don't know ... getting kind of loose ... tried to stay as disciplined as long as I could ... but we need pain, otherwise without discomfort, how would we know pleasure?

Coelha :B said...

Have you seen the movie WallE? It's the Disney movie where people live in the "lap of luxury" and do absolutely nothing.. They get so fat, they can't even walk. What kind of life is that?! Julie

Charley said...

At one time I compartmentalized my life and developed a whole serious of coping behaviors to try and improve my control and safety in dangerous situations.

Needless to say that didn't work out so well when a severe enough trauma decided to come along.

I still fight those learned behaviors and all the other pain I currently feel with a combination of meditation, prayer, writing, and medication.

While I don't necessarily approve of the way pharmaceuticals manipulate us I do believe that well tested and regulated use of medication is appropriate. If we have the brains to meditate, we have the brains to take a vicodin when necessary. ;)

John Hayes said...

Why do you hit your head against the wall? Because it feels so good when I stop.

Loving Annie sure said a mouthful. But sometimes, all questions of blame aside we just have to find a way to be with the pain, & for me playing a guitar quietly often works. Therapy with a good counselor also has done a lot for me.

I've always liked the "other than that Mrs. Lincoln" line, & I use it a lot. Wonder what that says about me.

Cathy said...

Mark: Are u saying w/o war how would we know peace? Still I get the idea and I'm not entirely sure why pain is so integral to our humanity, except for its obvious alarm to the brain when the body is out of whack. That would mean something inherited from ancestral memory perhaps? Sounds like you've made an "arrangement" with pain.

Julie: Didn't see that one, but if you enjoy that kind of "be careful what u wish for" humor, read "The Breast" I forget the author but it's a short page-turner and that's all I'll give away lol.

Charley: I reluctantly but realistically agree, that even tho the phara-criminals are moved by greed, when we're in physical distress who do we expect to help us? Funny how I thought of Rx before prayers gods or friends. Thank you for bringing it up. Your tool-box as it were sounds well-stocked, I esp think meditating helps, but when I hurt I grab a pill. Indoctrination? Or laziness.

John: Seems age has alot to do with finding that happy medium with physical pain, something you can live with and still wish would get lost lol. You have that guitar I've my piano and I expect we all have that "something" yet in the depths of honesty I can say the best art/prose/songs I ever composed were while in some form of "hurt". Wonder if we're meant to embrace a part of this somehow.

Diane J Standiford said...

In my family we didn't believe in pain. (That's right.) The first pain I remember feeling was when my first love left me. I suffer pain, feel it, let it force me into action and by my actions I remove it from me. Seems so simple to me. (Now, at 52, if I get a simple headache I think I have a brain tumor. But hitting, falling, needle inserting,no pain.) I guess I define the experience differently than some. Ok most? It is a part of life. When I read what others experience, well, if I'm dying with horrible body pain---just morphine me up and that's fine. Hey, pain is just being a human. No big deal. (IMO, ask me after I've gotten some pain-inducing disease.)

tony said...

If It's Bad.I go very quiet......people tell me I,m very 'hard to read' when upset.This is not a good trait i know!
Hey! Ever time in future i see "The Scream" I will think of a Kid with his iPod!
Have A Fine Weekend Cathy.

DB said...

I don't know, Cathy. I have experienced a lot of pain. I was a victim of physical abuse (torture) and once I had an exposed nerve in my jaw for three days. When I finally got into a dentist's chair he said I had been going through hell. He squirted the novocaine right on the nerve then pulled it out and showed it to me.

If extreme pain is hell, is extreme pleasure heaven? It sure may seem like it during a few hours in the bed with the right mate when all the senses are soaking in the joy.

I think in both cases the extremeness of it closes down the rational mind for a while. I believe one should do whatever one can use to achieve calm, peace and harmony. The less irrational reaction to the pain the better.

As for a broken heart I've had more than my share of those. There's an old saying: "The best cure is the next bus out of town." That's not as callous as it sounds. Though it takes time, that sort of pain eventually heals itself if you leave it alone.

DB

robert said...

What an impressive entry of yours!
Depending on the pain, I either try to swim as long as it takes for the pain to leave, or take me a book to read.
Most pain felt, is 'being afraid', that's why I would swim until there's no more pain or strength.
In pain with the world, probably should say with me, is the moment I take a book to see what others thought.
Wish you a painless weekend!

Gerry said...

I never take anything for pain because I need to feel my body to detect chronic fatigue symptoms, but I know what you are talking about because I sometimes think there is a downside to being taken care of in public housing, social security, and medicare. I thought how am I going to die I am so comfortable. I saw my aunt avoid any people she did not like including her own relatives until I thought she was so worry free and comfortable she really could not die. Her mind began to fail. But her body stayed extremely healthy for years. So I remind myself to go get involved when I start feeling like that, and start talking to people who might not be the brightest and the best but the only ones available to me. Good things happen when I extend myself out of my comfort zone. I think without challenge our minds do fail even when our bodies stay healthy. Gerry

Lou said...

I suck it up. Sorry, this stikes a note with me, because I'm in the medical field.
People no longer tolerate ANY pain. No not even pain, no discomfort what so ever. I'm weary of it.
It is routine for a 60 year old to be on 12 different meds. If you give someone the choice of losing 30# or having an artificial hip or knee--mostly everyone will opt for the surgery.
I'm astounded that no one ever questions the side effects of these meds.
I could go on and on, but I'll give you a break today;)

Ben said...

It's a delicate balance. Pain is how we grow - no test, no promotion - yet common sense also dictates it's possible to take that idea way too far and then the pain becomes a sign that something needs to change fast or significant damage will take place. Yes, we mustn't become wusses when faced with things we find unpleasant, but there's also a reason it's basic - and appropriate - human instinct to pull your hand back from a hot stove as fast as your reflexes will let you.

Pain - physical, emotional, or whatever - is like anything else in life: Spartan machismo notwithstanding, there are no cookie cutter solutions, and everything must be tempered with judgment.

Ben
http://ben-better-left-unsaid.blogspot.com/

Dave King said...

The use of Munch trying not to hear the scream is brilliant. You are right, we all do that. It is a tendency I find myself increasingly having to curb.

Starlene said...

I cook or bake something. Bread, meatloaf, italian ice. It's not the eating that matters, it's the mindfulness of procedure and the giving of nourishment to others. Why? I don't know. I also walk...preferably in the woods but anywhere will do. Sometimes to think, sometimes just to move. If it's the real serious kind of pain, physical or otherwise, I embrace it for awhile and then start looking for the light at the end of the tunnel. It's only when I don't see any light that things get sticky. In that case, I ask for help.

I'm not so sure that ipod thing is okay, on any level. Unnatural for sure, but definitely not contributing to the health of the whole and the whole is only as strong as the sum of its parts. I do have an ipod though. It helps me block out my neighbors' screaming children. Am I a hypocrite? : )

BTW, I really enjoyed the humor of that photo.

Herrad said...

Hi Cathy,

Came by to say hello, hope you are doing well.


Love,

Herrad

Donn said...

I wonder if the younger generation thinks/believes that they have their addiction to technology in check?
You are so right about their little iWorld.

I wonder if they understand that by exchanging their privacy and uniqueness for ubiquitous recognition in the unblinking 24/7 cyber-ether that they are giving more than they are getting?

Warhol's edict that everyone will have 15 minutes of Fame is destined to be trimmed down to 15 seconds. This is a black hole..a vortex that cannot be filled.

That being said I LOVE my ipod because I hate having to listen to the crap that they play on the radio :)

Martha said...

I guess we all do all kinds of things to avoid all different kinds of pain don't we?

I'm so glad you stopped by Cathy, haven't heard from you in a long time! I spend my blogging time these days playing photo memes, not much writing since the AOL days.

I hope all is well in your world! ((Hugs))

Trees said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Trees said...

Hi Luddie, I read all the comments and your entry, excellent entry my friend. There are many different types of pain and I certainly have endured most. As you know I live with pain in my whole body 24/7. I find that giving into the pain does no one any good. I live with it but I dont let it rule me, I try my best to carry on and never give into the pain. Yes sometimes I do too much and pay the price, I do try to stay away from meds, and opted to take lyrica and marcaine injections rather than narcotics, I have no desire to become a zombie. Pain of a lost relationship can be more heartbreaking and painful than this 24/7 pain I certainly have had my share of that. The pain of losing a loved one I dont think ever leaves you, you learn to live with it so it is not so unbearable but it is still within your heart. Many of us turn to different things to ease these pains, I find that reading and coming on here and helping others helps me. Exercises especially pool therapy helps. Most of all knowing that there is always someone hurting more than me helps me to know that my pain is tolerable, no matter what type I may experience. I also use art therapy which is very peaceful and rewarding.

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